i cant imagine dream interpretation actually means anything at this point

 I was in a war or an army but I switched sides. I don’t know why. The new army was better but I shot someone in the nose by accident. It was just a small hole and he said it was okay. Something happened and the part of the dream where I switched sides repeated. I didn’t shoot the guy in the nose this time but it was harder to escape the original army I was apart of. The new army didn’t question my old uniform. I shared my old army’s secrets with them. I don’t know if it was the same dream but we all had to go In this huge stadium carved into the side of the mountain. We were given yellow shirts. There was a cave part at the top where a lot of us were hanging out instead of watching what was going on outside. It was me and my friends I think. I came out to watch the last few people come up the mountainside/up the stadium to their seats. One of them was jaemin and they kept firing things/magic at him and he kept going up the mountain as if nothing had happened and they were in awe. They stopped when he had to shuffle along to his seat because the ledge was small and didn’t want to knock him off. But there was this small gap in the ledge that went straight down and he jumped into it and everyone was like wtf ??? Then my POV changed and I was watching jaemin and some girl had fallen down the mountain side and nobody knew. He used magic so there was some slide made out of rock so she didn’t die when she fell and we all made it down to the bottom. But the girl fell In this pit of lava thing and jaemin went after her. I couldn’t see down there and the lava hole closed. When it reopened He came back up alone and I tried to ask where the girl was and then she was magically there idk. And jaemin was a golden dragon then when he came out of the lava for some reason but everyone thought it was normal. We somehow got back to that cave at the top and he was really tired/worn out I guess ? So I put a blanket on him and I was just sitting like taking care of him. And I was pointing out the entrance of the cave at my friend for some reason trying to make him feel better. And some assholes who for some reason were people I remember going to middle school with were there in the cave and they started saying shit about jaemin like it was for attention and some other stuff. And I got really mad and hit one of them and thought “why can’t I hit in real life I thought that only happened in dreams” but I fought both of them and something else happened and then i was in high school again ? And I couldn’t find my class so I went to the office and got a schedule then I went and found the first class (I was very late). And the teacher asks why I was late and I hold up some plushie they gave me in the office (???????) And hes like ok. And he gave me some random tests like throwing hot embers on me and when I didn’t react he was like wow the self control. And the classroom changed smth happened and it gets kinda fuzzy at this point but the last thing I remember is a pug telling me and some other person about how horrible the future was and why we gotta do something to stop it 

however painful, i like to b alive.

Even though the sun burns
I’ll never stop looking

No matter how much it hurts
I’ll never close my eyes 

I squint against the light

When I’m able to see again
The world is both too vivid and too dull 

The sky is brilliant as always 
And the sun is blinding
Scorching everything it touches
And blessing those it doesn't

I wave to passerby

letting out whoops and yells when they wave back

I hope this means as much to them

As it means to me

The acknowledgment of existence in the eyes of others 

Is a gift beyond gratitude 

I stand up 

Licking the salt from my lips

I perch precariously where no one else dares 

There are shouts of alarm and worry

But nothing can touch me

For in this moment

I truly feel free 
Only the wind can touch me now

If illusions are illusions 

It wouldn’t matter

If we don’t know any better

Nothing can prevent us from feeling

If I die I won't be upset
I've lived how I want
And if I stop
It won't be my problem anymore